V

So, I have a lesson to teach all you kiddies out there about your choice in sexual activities. To be the example for this lesson, I present my roommate Kelsey. Kelsey is dating a guy named Nick, but for the sake of having to write his name out oh so many times, I will hereby refer to him as "Douchebag" for short.

Okay, so Kelsey and Douchebag had the entire room to themselves this past weekend because I was on my roadtrip of wonders. Little red flags going up already? Good.

Well, I noticed right away on Monday that Kelsey had a nice, new developement on the side of her neck. Yes, my friends, I'm referring to the "whore"rific spots that we sometimes call hickies. Kelsey had a very nice V-shaped hickey right where the whole world could see it. But we're in college, so no big deal, right? Wrong.

Kelsey is now being picked up by her parents in a couple hours, and still, the hickey is there. After several attempts, she managed to cover it with makeup, but mothers ain't no fools, ladies and gents. Kelsey's parents are officially going to know that their child is a slut. Yes, dear readers, a slut.

That is all.

Why today was awesome: IT'S THE YULE BALL TONIGHT! WOOOOOO!

My year in numbers:

How Many Books I've Read: 2.5

How Many Times I've Lost My Key: 5

How Many Bowls of Soup I've Consumed: 9